Monday, 9 June 2014

Move over bogeyman .....

                           .... I've just found something far more scarey -
                                  THE CUMMERBUND
- read on if you dare! 
                                    She sat upon her Dobie,--
                                         She heard the Nimmak hum,--
                                         When all at once a cry arose,--
                                        'The Cummerbund is come!'
                                                 In vain she fled: -- with open jaws
                                          The angry monster followed,
                                             And so, (before assistence came,)
                                                That Lady Fair was swallowed.

There are Cummerbunds at the bottom of my garden ......
They sought in vain for even a bone
      Respectfully to bury,--
They said, -- 'Hers was a dreadful fate!'
      (And Echo answered 'Very.')
They nailed her Dobie to the wall,
      Where last her form was seen,
And underneath they wrote these words,
      In yellow, blue, and green:--
Beware, ye Fair! Ye Fair, beware!
      Nor sit out late at night,--
Lest horrid Cummerbunds should come,
      And swallow you outright.

I'm not really sure where this train of thought came from,
I blame it on the medication, but good old Edward Lear's
fine words are enough to get small grandchildren
in from the garden pretty sharpish once the shadows
start to lengthen.  I can recommend it as bedtime
reading for any small person of a nervous disposition.
I'm 5'2" and believe me I no longer linger in the
raspberries after dark!

A cummerbund can also be an item of gent's clothing
of course, seen modelled here by a big butch
Glaswegian after five pints of heavy and a
deep fried Mars bar - I think we all can guess
what comes next and that's pretty scarey too
- a pukka Glasgow kiss! (Look it up if you don't know).
I think on this occasion I'll just settle for good old
Beck's with a jumper round his waist!
I'd be a fool not to.


  1. Replies
    1. Then keep out of the raspberries after dark unless you're wth a drunk Glaswegian or Becks.

  2. I'm 5'5" but I'll still hide in the raspberries with the Glaswegian. ;)

    1. Well don't make so much noise next time, you kept me awake last night!

  3. Becks and the Glaswegian wooohooooooooooo