On this occasion I've decided, never mind twelfth night,
tradition and all that stuff because my hall is no longer
decked with boughs of holly (truth be told it never was as
it's perilously narrow at the best of times).
'Tis no longer the season to be jolly (thank goodness, I do
a good "mildly amused", my "cynical" is awesome but
"jolly" isn't really my thing). The only remaining trace of
the festivities is the odd little sparkle of glitter still clinging
stubbornly to the rug that will probably continue to catch
the light until mid-summer when I give the hoover bag it's
annual empty and full suction returns once more to the
Where is all this leading? Nowhere really but I do love a
good preamble to entice my readers in. It's like the cheese
in a mousetrap or the smell of rotting meat given off by
the Venus fly trap which, sadly, only seems to work with
insects and health inspectors intent upon keeping the
public safe at all times by tracking down the source of
the foul odour.
However, in 2016 none of you will be safe in your beds
because Long Dog will be celebrating it's 20th birthday
this summer and I shall be releasing a series of utterly
amazing new designs throughout the year starting on
Saturday 23rd January. Put in in your diary now!
So try to be brave (there's a clue there somewhere),
resistance will be futile as this new mutation of the
Long Dog virus has no known cure and the only way to
cope with the symptoms is to treat yourself to each new
design as it appears.
Lay back then ladies, gentlemen and those of you who are
as yet undecided, and be prepared to give yourselves over
to absolute pleasure, it's going to be one hell of a year!
Would I lie to you?